It was a cold fall day when Karen disappeared.
Her parents noticed that she didn’t return after her morning walk like usual.
Karen was quite the homebody so any change in her usual routine was questionable at best.
But this was concerning. Karen moved back in with her parents after a bad breakup 7 years ago and hadn’t been out all night since.
Her mother called the police trying not to be worried and her father immediately drove around town putting up missing person papers with their number attached.
Later that day the police found Karen’s clothes on her usual walking trail. It wasn’t looking good.
At this news, her mother sobbed.
They also found a pack of Nitrilean diet pills in her pocket. Nothing else.
Her father did think the diet pills were odd. He knew Karen was exercising more but she hadn’t mentioned any pills and he thought maybe it could be a link to her disappearance.
He mentioned it to the police when her mother was out of earshot, but the police officer didn’t seem interested at all.
–
After two weeks of nothing, her mother’s nerves had only gotten worse. Despite her best efforts, her tea cup rattled as she placed it down.
She was especially unnerved that she thought she had been hearing voices the past few days.
Or rather, one voice. Karen’s voice.
She was certain her experience was nervous breakdown until one day the voice was so loud, she couldn’t ignore it anymore.
It sounded like Karen’s voice was coming right into her ear.
“Mom! Mom! Mother! Can’t you hear me!”
Her mother couldn’t pretend she wasn’t hearing her voice anymore. She looked to make sure no one was around to hear her talking to her missing daughter so no one would question her sanity.
“Karen! Darling! I can hear you! Where are you? Are you- are you dead?!”
She cringed at what she might hear back.
“No! I’m not dead! I’m- I’m right here!”
“Where?! I can’t see you!”
“I know mom. Mom, it’s hard to say this. So don’t freak out.”
“Oh Karen! What is it?!”
“Mom… I’m… I’m in your ear.”
“Aaaaagh!”
“Aaaaah! Mom, I said don’t freak out! You freaking out is like an earthquake for me!”
“Oh honey! I’m sorry! What do you mean you’re in my ear?!”
“Well Mom, I don’t know how to tell you this but I’m very very VERY small.”
“Very small? How small?!”
“Well, I’m in your ear! I don’t know exactly how small I am, but I appear to be micro-sized.”
“Karen! How did this happen to you?! Where have you been?”
“Where have I been?! I’ve been walking for weeks trying to get back to the house. And don’t even get me started on how long it took to climb up here.
As for how, I think it was my Nitrilean diet pills. I ordered them online to try to drop a few extra pounds, not get micro-sized!”
–
Unfortunately for Karen and her family there was no cure for her micro-sized accident. What were deemed to be radioactive diet pills got accidentally mixed into the bunch.
(This has a high level government conspiracy cover-up written all over it.)
But it worked out for Karen in some ways. She enjoyed being a homebody anyway, and they just micro sized her life: micro home, micro food, micro car.
It was a little weird at first, but the settlement from Nitrilean helped them readjust.
Even though this story is completely fictional Nitrilean diet pills are not. They may not micro-size you, but they might help you get started on that winter body you’ve been looking to get into. If you’re having a hard time getting started on your diet, see if these will help.
Just to give you a heads up, our site is run off ads and affiliate promotions. The promotion for this short story is Nitrilean. If you click any of the Nitrilean affiliate links in this post and decide to try them to help with your diet it will help us continue to put out free information and entertainment and it will come at no extra cost to you. Thank you and feel free to browse around!
*Nitrilean has not micro sized any customers and no settlements have paid for any customer micro sizing as far as we are aware.
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Jeremy – great short story — but your cliff-hanger….mmk, not so much. I have a degree in marketing and probably enjoy advertising copy more than most folks…. but come on… more story or more add — this one is “killing me, Smalls!!”
Hey Pamela, thanks for your thoughts. What would you say was the cliff hanger? What were you hoping for? What about it let you down?
More story or more ad? At the end of the day it’s 100% a creative ad. I’m totally happy with saying both/and. It’s a story and an ad and that’s an enjoyable and fun creative way I’m enjoying writing write now. It’s meant to be cheeky. Sorry my ad yolks didn’t crack you up!