Why Do People Discourage Writers from Writing?
I don’t know if you’ve been in this situation before, but something tells me if you’re reading this you have.
You like to write. Maybe you like to write stories and novels. Maybe one day you dream of being published or getting paid to write.
If you fall into this category of liking to write you may have told someone you care about that you enjoy writing and might want to publish one day. They may have looked at you funny and said something like,
“So you’re gonna be the next J. K. Rowling huh? You becoming a successful writer is very unlikely.”
They immediately discouraged it. They told you in no uncertain terms that it is probably a bad idea to think that you could publish or get paid to write one day.
It’s hard to be vulnerable and share things we are passionate about with others, especially when they don’t resonate with us the way we desire them to.
Why do those we care to share our love of writing with say things like this and what should we do about it?
I’m sure they mean well.
If it’s your parents or someone in your family, I’m sure they mean well. They want more than anything to see us succeed and they want to shelter us from making what they think are “bad” decisions.
It’s understandable. But should we listen to it?
If you love to write, then just keep writing.
If you want to be a writer then write. Nobody is telling you to quit your day job and think that you’ll be a successful writer overnight.
Most successful writers worked their “derrieres” off writing for months and more likely years before anything caught traction.
Even in the freelance writing world, it can take months to land that first client and that might not even work out.
I remember my first two copywriting clients. One paid me $50 to write her About Me page (she didn’t seem super pleased) and the second hired me at $20/hour and politely told me “this isn’t gonna work out” after 3 hours.
Talk about overnight success.
But I didn’t quit and before long I learned a little more. Got a little better and started working with clients at $100 plus an hour.
So all that to say. Don’t quit your day job till you can afford to, but don’t quit writing either.
Most success stories have a common component: the person didn’t quit even when they failed. They just kept going and learning till they figured out what works and what doesn’t work.
Maybe it’ll just be a hobby for a bit and then become a side hustle, but to just obligatorily think you can’t make money writing or be a successful writer is quite the contrary to reality in our day and age.
Don’t tell just anyone.
As a creative and someone that loves creating and writing things whether it is art, or music, or writing I’ve learned two secrets.
One is that when I talk about what I’m thinking of creating I get enjoyment from what people say about the idea rather than the actual thing and then with that satisfaction I might not even desire to make it anymore. It’s a strange phenomenon but one that I’ve learned to watch out for.
So these days I try to create in secret and then reveal when it is finished.
Two, when you tell people what you’re creating and why they are likely to discourage you and not help or support you. Sometimes it’s better to keep what you’re doing to yourself until it’s finished, well polished, and “impressive,” before letting anyone put an eye on it.
Just personally I wouldn’t recommend showing a painting you’re doing to anyone in the middle of it because it might look like some silly lines or colors.
They may say, “oh that’s nice… what is it supposed to be?” 👀
Rather than having this awkward interaction, just create the thing and when it looks amazing, then you can let people look at it.
If you create in secret, you are more likely to finish and less likely to get bad feedback along the way.
So look forward to showing someone your ACCOMPLISHMENTS someday and try not to daydream too much (I know it’s fun, but it’s not very rewarding).
Find a community that will push you forward.
Even though family members and close friends might think they are doing you a favor by discouraging you from writing, you don’t have to listen to their ideas. They are just opinions.
They may be right, they may be wrong, but at the end of the day no human, not even you can predict your future.
If you really love to write it might be a good idea to find other people that love writing and talk with them about what you’re working on and see what they are writing too.
(At some point during your editing process, you’ll want to find writers that have a good critical voice, but that’s for later after you finish your story.)
And if you want to go into freelance writing, (which I highly recommend, alongside blogging for income) then you should find others and find out all you can from them.
Finding people that are already doing the thing you want to be good at is extremely beneficial compared to doing it on your own.
You can find others on Reddit, Twitter, FB, blogs, etc. Even if you can’t find people in person right now that enjoy writing as you do, you can find them online and start to join the conversation. Don’t make it all about your writing, be polite and be inquisitive about theirs as well.
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Why Do People Discourage Writers from Writing?
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That’s all for now.
Hope this helps!
Happy writing!
Other Resources You Might Enjoy:
How to Start a Blog in 11 Simple Easy Steps in 2020
How to Write a Book: 32 Tips | Your MASSIVE Guide How to Write a Book
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Why Do People Discourage Writers from Writing?
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